Self-sabotage and self-worth are the themes of this personal reflection. I use the image of a pact to describe a pattern that holds someone back, while self-respect points toward a different response.
Self-sabotage and self-worth
All of us made at some point in our lives a pact to not let ourselves win.
Whenever we were close to victory instead of winning, we have chosen to use self-sabotage, to turn against ourselves.
We do it daily, there are so many examples:
- Smoking, so we destroy our health
- Starting to workout, only to stop again and again
- Reading a book and never finishing it
- Starting a project and never finishing it
- Getting into a lovely relationship and then self-sabotaging it and destroying the relationship
- Over-eating and becoming fat
- Working hard for our career to finally making the wrong move
- …
The list is endless.
At some point we just think we do not deserve it.
We think we are not worthy to be a winner.
To win in life. To win in a relationship, to win the love of your lives.
We all have to break that pact we once entered in.
That starts with forgiving ourselves. Showing self-respect and self-love.
And break the pact.
Question the pattern without losing yourself
Why did we ever enter such a pact of self-destruction?
Most likely it was a traumatic event that made us believe “we are not worthy of winning in life”. Or someone told us. Maybe a bully. Or even our parents or a brother or sister. Maybe a teacher. Or the divorce of our parents? A tragic life situation? Or we got our hearts broken by someone we loved? We lost trust? Did we feel unworthy? We felt lost?
Something triggered us to believe we are not worthy of living a life worth living.
Something put us in that prison of guilt and shame.
It’s time to reflect and break that pact.
For love. For yourself.
Tell yourself you are worthy of love, because you are worthy of love.
Remember that you are worthy of living life to the fullest, because you deserve your best life.
Tell yourself you are worthy of winning, because you deserve victories.
You are worthy of love. You are LOVE.
